John Martz

And what’s the deal with airline peanuts?

Kat and I went to a friend-of-a-friend’s comedy show on Friday, and while we had fun, I think the majority of our entertainment came from mutual glances at each other with expressions on our faces as if to say, “are you kidding me?”

We realized that people who aren’t funny have only a few methods of telling jokes: for example, talking about their penises.  Or speaking in acccents.  Or by sharing their brilliant, entirely unique observations.  “Hey if Arnold Schwarzenegger is going to be the governor of California, shouldn’t he be able to pronounce California?  Yuk yuk yuk yuk yuk!”

Painful.  Absolutely painful.  One guy’s entire act was getting up on stage and speaking in a German accent and improvising about how Germans don’t have senses of humour.  I know.  Brilliant material.  As if on cue, Kat and I turned to each other in unison and in our best McBain voices said to each other, “ZAT’S DE JOKE!”

One of the perfomers actually told the following:  “I was thinking I’d write a new adult version of Winnie the Pooh. It’s going to be called Winnie the Shit!”

Seriously.  A grown man.

At least I won a raffle prize: a brand-new top-of-the-line Jennifer Garner Elektra bobble head.  Oh yes.